Intelligence Report/Citizens of Interest/Madame Valeria's House of Wonders

Madame Valeria's House of Wonder

In a reasonably quiet corner of Morley Sector, on Crandon's Walk in Level 8 of Lower Downtown sits the tiny storefront of Madame Valeria. People expecting to see a wizened old woman running the store are sorely mistaken. Madame Valeria is twelve years old. Her store is full of interesting and potentially illegal items. Doc Jug trades with her for some of her more unusual pieces. The services she provides are myriad. Curios, charms and talismans are available. Potions can be brewed. Information can be located, be it in the past, present, or future. Even hexes, curses and assorted whammies are available for the right price.

Valeria works for cash or trade, but don't consider cheating this little girl. The Johannas hold her in the highest regard and revere her as a wise-woman and healer; she enjoys their unquestioning protection. Most people treat her with respect and fear. If the protection of the Johannas is not enough deterrent from harming her, the sawed-off Bully Boy she keeps under her desk works just as well. What really keeps everyone in line is the fact that her concoctions, talismans and spells all seem to work. They work so well that some have suggested that she is able to tap the Ebb.

Nobody seems to know the history of this enigmatic girl or her shop.. She speaks little, and of herself, nothing. In Downtown, some stories claim that Valeria does not age; she has been twelve for as long as anyone can remember. As far as anyone can tell, she is as ageless as Mr. Slayer and possibly as mysterious. Ebons who have attempted to read her are unable to get concrete information and are always shaken by the attempt.

“When I attempted to touch her mind it was like stepping into the cosmos. There was at once a sense of terrible limitless emptiness. Then you felt the power lying underneath. The power to either bend this universe to her will or simply rend it asunder. I truly fear this child more than Mr. Slayer or any of the nightmares of his World of Progress.”

-Othin, Ebon SCL 6B.4 (Not for reprint)

While there is concern over the power she allegedly wields and the dubious legality of the items in her shop, SLA Industries officially treats her as a persona non grata. Her shop brings genuine comfort to the people of Downtown. She never engages in any business that is needlessly detrimental to the citizens. When her services are requested for anything of a dubious nature, she makes it perfectly clear that fate does not smile upon people who would use her powers for ill purpose.

“I can do what you ask. I can bring your desires to light. Be warned though, my child. If you would bend my will to bring woe to those who do not deserve it, I will know. I will return that ire unto you amplified a thousandfold. Misuse my gifts and I will destroy you. This is as sure as the rain.”

-Madame Valeria

In the end, the Shivers either avoid her entirely or are regular clients, Monarch knows better than to be anything but reverent and the Dark Finders are unable to find out the slightest bit of useful information about her. SLA simply just ignores her at this point. After all, what harm can one little girl do?

BPN Resolution: DEPARTMENT OF RESEARCH: JADE

Issuing Department: Research
Color Code:JADE
BPN #: CD/41163288/DL
Surveillance: Station Analysis
Squad/Operative Undertaking: Team Spartan
Date Issued/Date Completed:3/9/903, 3/10/903
Summary:

• Squad dispatched to Cannibal Sector 1 to investigate an Ebb-sensitive artifact of indeterminate origin. If possible, Squad was to retrieve item; video footage acceptable if artifact unable to be transported back to Sector Wall.
  

• Squad rendezvoused with Sector Ranger base on the river and assisted in repelling a Cannibal assault.

• Squad continued on past river to approximate location of Ebb source.
  

• Squad located source of Ebb inside cave.

• [D-NOTICE]

• [D-NOTICE]

Collateral Damage to SLA Property:NONE. Operation took place in Cannibal Sector 1.

Squad Fatalities:None.

Conclusion:BPN satisfactorily completed. Squad payout+Retrieval Bonuses: 7000c. SCL +0.5/Operative.

Advertising Supplement/Restaurants/Taco Folders

Taco Folders

Type: Mexican fast food delivery

Location: Uptown

Description: Taco Folders is a 24 hour Mexican fast food restaurant that deals strictly in deliveries. There is a single Taco Folders location which is unable to accept dine-in or carry out orders. How can a single location, delivery-only restaurant deal with the vastness of Mort? Simple. Reality Folding. Taco Folders was created by two enterprising young Brain Wasters by the names of Moloch and Fester. Both had recently graduated from Meny and were already growing tired of BLUE BPN’s and having barely enough money to order a pizza.

One night, after beating the crap out of a pizza delivery man for not making it to their apartment in fifteen minutes, they lamented on the lack of truly “fast” delivery on Mort. As they ate their pizza, they realized it would just be easier to Reality Fold out to get the pizza themselves. However, it would cost them FLUX coming and going. Then inspiration struck. What if the food could be folded directly to them? They could almost hear the credits rolling in. People would pay big money for the convenience of having food delivered virtually instantaneously. Thus Taco Folders was born.

The question arose of how to produce the Flux necessary for this undertaking. Moloch’s father, Shadow, is an Ebon who works in Dark Lament. Anxious to have as little to do with his Waster son as possible, Shadow bought Moloch a case of Eternal Flux Gems.

The process of ordering is simple: Fax in your order along with your address and a picture of the room you want the food delivered to. Then simply authorize the payment from your account. At the restaurant, cooks prepare your meal and hand it off to the shipping department. The shipping department is a single Necanthrope named Clarity. Clarity was a SCL 2.1C Foldship navigator for over a hundred years. However repeated trips past White Earth and out towards the Black Stump have taken their toll on his mind. When asked why he would take such a menial job, Clarity’s answer is quite disturbing. “I have seen more than any mind should have to comprehend. I have beheld the face of our universe and realize how insignificant I truly am. I seek simplicity. Once I traveled the cosmos at will. Now I provide sustenance to the people of this dead planet. Is one any less amazing than the other?” With Clarity’s knowledge of Reality Folding, an address and picture is more than enough information to send orders directly to the table of the customer.

Taco Folders has been described by The Preceptor Teeth as “one of the more egregious wastes of Flux I have witnessed. This enterprise is an embarrassment to entire society of Ebb users. If I had still had the capacity to laugh or cry, I don’t know which I would do in regards to this.” No small claim coming from the most powerful Ebb user on the planet. However, this public chastisement has served to make Taco Folders extremely profitable. Profitable enough that SLA Industries and the Department of Ebb are looking to acquire the up-and-coming business. Taco Folders is also in talks with Dark Lament about an endorsement.

A meal from Taco Folders starts at about 3 credits for a single combo meal. Larger meals will cost more and may take a few extra minutes. Meals generally take 5-7 minutes from order to delivery. However, Taco Folders guarantees no meal will ever take more than 10 minutes.