Sunday, October 10, 2010

Advertising Supplement/Sports/Mort Hockey League

Mort Hockey League

Type: Professional Hockey Organization

Location: Stadiums in Central, Uptown, Upper and Lower Downtown

Description: The Mort Hockey League (MHL) maintains four divisions of three teams each. The Divisions break down as follows:

Mort Central Division

Camden Sector Sanguines

Pegram Sector Rainfall

Carver Sector Fusion

Uptown Division

Runyon Sector Legionnaires

Striplin Sector Ennui

Rascette Sector Infernos

Suburbia Division

Maxwell Sector Ice Clowns

Freedman Sector Reapers

Macklin Sector Highlanders

Downtown Division

Lowell Sector Sewer Rats

Lower Hambelton Pest Control

Upper Hambelton Smoking Octopi

Each team has its own arena which is used for other events (concerts, conventions, other sports and Contract Circuit events) when the team is at an away game and during the off-season. It comes as a surprise to many people that the Downtown arenas are kept in very good repair and have their own Shiver Station attached.

Shivers have a special connection to the MHL, as the Lower Hambelton Pest Control began its life as an all Shiver hockey club. It is a matter of pride that the Shivers have had at least one of their ranks playing for each team in the MHL since the inception of the league. Each Shiver department in a league sector works hard to get a player on the local team. Shivers who go pro are excused from active duty during their time in the league, though they can be called to active duty in times of emergency. Shivers playing in the MHL are permitted to draw their regular Shiver salaries on top of league pay. Pay in the MHL is based on time and talent. Rookies can expect to make around 2,000c per season while veteran stars command 20,000c and up. Production and post season bonuses add to the pay and endorsement money can also sweeten the deal. Ennui star Jacques Forlaine brings in upwards of 50,000c per season with endorsements and bonuses. Not bad for a Shiver Sergeant.

The MHL is co-ed, with most teams having one or two women on the roster. On interesting side-note, over 65% of the women in the MHL play goalie. The MHL is exempt from the Racial Equality Program; Shaktars and Stormers are not permitted to play (even if they wanted to). Ebons and Brain Wasters, while not strictly prohibited, show no interest in playing the sport, let alone watching it. Wraith Raiders have become huge MHL fans, likely due to the ice and cold of the venues. Wraiths are permitted in the MHL; their speed and grace make them natural players, and several Wraiths have found fame in the ranks of the MHL. Frothers are permitted to play; the Macklin Highlanders is actually an all Frother team. The incredibly strict anti-drug policies tend to keep more Frothers out of the MHL, regardless of how much they enjoy the fighting and hitting people with sticks.

Drug screening in the MHL is regular and stringent, and no biogenetic enhancements are permitted. There is a zero tolerance policy for both, with a lifetime ban for the first offense. No explanations or excuses are accepted. There is no appeals process. Since the league began in 826SD, only eight players have been ejected for violating the drug and biogenetic policies. Players know better and respect the MHL far too much to risk it.

The MHL has worked to keep game tickets affordable, considering that a quarter of the teams in the league operate in low-income sectors. Ticket prices start at 5u for a standing room only pass to 125u for a seat on the glass at center ice at a marquee game. Each stadium can hold around 20,000 fans, so there are plenty of tickets in all price ranges. All games are televised, so fans who can't afford to get tickets can still follow their favorite teams.

Dining choices at games vary from stadium to stadium, with companies annually bidding on vending rights. Expect to see choices like BacBurger or Paramour Pizza in Suburbia/Downtown arenas, while Uptown/Central arenas offer selections from establishments such as Chez Bummin' or Hey! Fondue! Private boxes are often catered by fine restaurants like Martindale's.

An MHL season is 82 games, half played at home and half on the road. The playoffs is an elimination tournament consisting of four rounds of best-of-seven series. The first three rounds determine which team from each conference will advance to the final round. The grand prize in the MHL is the Progress Cup, a large platinum trophy etched with the champion roster for each year. Despite using small print, the Cup has grown to over five feet tall; when space runs out on the cup, another level is added.

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